Five weeks ago.

Five weeks ago, I laid down to take a nap. I felt an overwhelming presence of unhappiness. I laid in bed and repeated to myself, "I want to be free", until I fell asleep.

I woke up a few hours later and M was home from playing golf. He was having a conversation with me and I was doing dishes. He said quietly, "Are you getting tired of me?"

I looked up at him and I knew - it was time. I hadn't planned for it. I hadn't formulated any strategy.

We sat down at the kitchen table and laid out our concerns and unmet expectations.

A few hours later, we had planned our separation.

Two weeks later, I was living in an apartment.

Today, I am free. The universe fulfilled on my sleepy request.


--

I used to be sad when I reflected on my break up with my college boyfriend. He moved to Canada to pursue being an artist, while I still had a year left in school. I didn't think we were going to make it through the long distance and we didn't. At the time, I felt abandoned and devalued. He told me years later that next time... he would fight for love.

I wanted that so badly. I was just thrilled that my pain paved the way for the next lucky lady.

How do you know when it's worth fighting for? When there's any fight left.